My father texts.

My father just texted me: "R U home?" This is accompanied by a sound clip of "Sakura."

Oh, Dad.

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Saturday, in meals

Breakfast:
Yogurt and cereal, cranky because we're out of milk
Tea

Snack:
1 quart of milk. (There were people handing out free gallons of milk!!!!)

Lunch:
Cheeseburger

Dinner:
Pepto Bismol
Popcorn

More Dinner:
Peanuts
2 Shirley Temples

I've almost recovered, I swear.

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Welcome to June 2009!

I finally got a digital converter for my tiny white TV! And holy damn, I always thought the TV was shit, but in reality, the reception was shit. It's also amusing seeing a digital menu on an old box-shaped TV.

Other observations: there is a lot of god TV over here. Yes, god, not good. One of the first things I did was remove the praise channels, even though they were momentarily entertaining. I think there were at least six.

And, luddite that I am, I'm super confused that there's more than one channel 7, and they all have different shows on. One station seems to be devoted to Andy Griffith.

Maybe I'll start watching more TV now. I just got back from my grandparents' place, where I always develop a minor addiction. I actually said out loud, "Oh, it's time for Conan O'Brien!" But it was Saturday, so SNL was on.

At least now I'll be able to watch the Olympics. And that's a little bit exciting, considering how close they'll be in real life.

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Smell/Taste Flash

Sometimes I'll randomly taste or smell things. It's not an association thing--it's not like I'll be in the same room as a scented candle and think I smell daffodils--just random flashes. And it's not correlated to anything--it's not like every time my foot itches I taste beef stew. But it's random like that.

Like just now, I could distinctly taste a gin tonic. Or quinine. Whatever. But I can't recreate that sensation. I just remember it, like a quickly fading dream.

Part of me wants it to be synesthesia, but it's way too irregular, and it's not linked to anything specific. I guess I could be having tiny seizures like that epileptic woman who smelled burnt toast before she had one. Tiny, imperceptible seizures. Yeah, totally.

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Half-tuned out

So as my brain continues to atrophy, I find that I also get books mixed up. For a minute I thought Julia Roberts and James Franco are starring in Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, which is a book about a woman's attempt to only feed her family local foods for a year. My only memory of this book--as I haven't read it yet--is seeing a hippie girl reading it on the bus, and being amused by the title.

Well, as those of you who live in the real world probably know, Roberts and Franco are starring in Eat, Pray, Love, which is yet another book turned movie about a woman having an early-mid-life crisis and then doing something drastic and escapist.

As I continue to read wikipedia, the more disenchanted I get. The author of Eat, Pray, Love (Elizabeth Gilbert) funded her year-long trip with an advance on the book she would write about the experience. Oh, and did you know she wrote the essay that Coyote Ugly is based on? I'm okay with her being a phenomenal writer, but she must have an awesome publicist/agent.

Everyone seems to love Eat, Pray, Love. Oprah dedicated 2 episodes to it. Time Magazine has this puke-worthy compliment:

"To read about her struggles with a 182-verse Sanskrit chant, or her (successful) attempt to meditate while being feasted on by mosquitoes, is to come about as close as you can to enlightenment-by-proxy."

I'm sure I'll probably pick up Eat, Pray, Love once I forget how artificial and premeditated Gilbert's self-discovery seems, and knowing me, I'll probably like it. But right now I'm still annoyed.

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This is why I am bad at learning languages.

I am much more interested in finding out if there is a Japanese translation for the slang term "cougar" than I am in grammar. Or you know, useful words.

Unfortunately, I only found translations for older man with younger woman ( 夕暮れ族、ゆうぐれぞく、yuugurezoku), and the young lover of an older woman (若い燕、わかいつばめ, wakaitsubame), and that is lame. They acknowledge that it happens, but I can't find the right word. I guess I'll have to ask a J-person the next time I can tactfully insert it in a conversation. Ha. Ha. Ha.

(This all came about because G is playing some confusing game called Lux-Pain, which might have the worst text-dialogue inconsistencies EVER, and there was totally a cougar talking to the main character. Totally.)

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So...

I went to the Last Harvey Danger show ever. Actually, I went to the last three shows. I didn't think I cared that much, but then a radio station announced that the only show I didn't buy a ticket for had sold out. And that's how I went to three Harvey Danger shows in 24 hours. (Well, closer to 30, but you get it.)

I heard all the songs I wanted to hear, and I even got to request a song (along with tons of other people)--Oh You Pretty Things, originally by David Bowie.

They were all great shows, but I still can't believe I was in the right city at the right time for these shows. It usually doesn't work out that way. James broke up a few months before I'd gotten into them, and it wasn't like I'd go to Edinburgh for their last show.

I'm supremely happy right now. Just wanted to let everybody know.

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Names, or Little Boy is Awesome.

Me: What's your doll's name?
Girl 1: I don't know. [We are at the office, playing with dolls they don't normally play with.]
Me: Well, can you make a pretend name? Just for today?
Girl 1: Cinderella?
Girl 2: My doll's name is Sleeping Beauty!

And apparently, a little boy that was not playing with dolls offered his own name: Trash. I didn't hear it, but his mom told me. Hilarious. This little boy is the sweetest child ever, which makes it even funnier. He's either currently obsessed with trash, or is not a fan of those dolls.

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Twitter fail!

I know these things probably do not interest you, but they amuse me.

In my last twitter, I mentioned I had a burrito with mole sauce (two syllables, not one). Now, a guy with a mole/wart removal web site is following me. I'm sure it's done automatically (someone from Peru started following me after I mentioned eating guinea pig in Peru), but it's still funny. I wonder how many Mexican food enthusiasts he's inadvertently following?

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I still kind of miss Jim Henson.

I went to the Jim Henson exhibit at EMP today. It was great, of course, and included a small stage where you could control a muppet for a short song. There were also 4-5 walls covered in soft muppet fur, and I had to restrain myself from rubbing my face all over it. Sooo soft. Sooo covered in little kid snot. I was bummed that they cut off the exhibit at The Dark Crystal and Fraggle Rock, but there was a space constraint, so oh well. (No LABYRINTH!!!!! I know it's a little redundant, but still! Bah.)

Also, a small confession: Jim Henson was cute when he was younger. Pre-hippie beard. Look:

I guess it doesn't hurt that he resembles Jimmy Stewart, and both are similar to G. Hee hee.

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Google Image Search

This cracks me up.

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Guinea Pig on a Stick

Time to flesh out a twitter!

So, this kid tells me he's going to Peru this summer for two weeks with his family. (Lucky!) And he says he's going to eat guinea pig on a stick, obviously reveling in the grossout factor. We discussed what it might taste like. He guessed chicken, I guessed pork, but I've never had small mammal before. Part of me hopes I'm still around in September when he comes back for a few more sessions (at my fake job, did I tell you I have a fake job? It's boring, and 99% babysitting.) so I can hear his stories, but most of me hopes I will have a Real Job by then.

While on the topic of crazy food, I told him he would like basashi. I hope he turns out awesome, because any 9-year-old who wants to eat the crazy food is awesome. (Although he doesn't like "pasta with basil and chicken and green beans." Totally puzzling.)

Also, I bought my first shallot ever on Tuesday! So Fancy! (Sorry, it amuses me when I buy an ingredient for the first time. I was equally pleased with myself the first time I bought cauliflower.)

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Finally tried a chicken foot

And it was pretty good. I think whatever yuck factor there might have been got steamrolled by my desire to try something completely new. I decided that it would be good food for eating in front of the television, where I could just chew and chew and not have to worry about gracefully spitting out knuckle bones (is that even possible?) or missing out on whatever came next.

L, I miss you. The group I went to dim sum with fixated on steamed pork buns and just filled up on them. Sure they're good (I know I had two) but I wanted to try everything, and there was no other bottomless pits in our group. The food coma didn't even hit until I got home! Sigh. I'm glad I finally experienced dim sum in Seattle though.

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Reuben Update: Naked City Taphouse

We went to Naked City Taphouse in Greenwood to celebrate Re's birthday with his mom. I'm pretty sure the sandwich was good, but unfortunately it took a long time to order, and around 40 minutes to get our food. Also unfortunate (and hilarious), Gr woke up late and didn't eat anything before we left for lunch, and started his day with a pint of very strong beer.

The sandwich was what I'd expect of a homemade Reuben, where all the parts are identifiable--"grain-fed natural pastrami" and marbled rye. (I guess it doesn't count as a true Reuben, since it's not corned beef.) But nothing really stood out. It's kind of disappointing, because the menu was mostly sandwiches, and you'd think the sandwiches would all be awesome. I know, it's a primarily a bar, but the Elysian was better than that.

I also made the poor choice of pairing the sandwich with a chicken chowder. I couldn't help it, I was starving, and hoping I'd get the soup right away. It was good, but it resembled a chunky creamy chicken salsa. Meh. Salad next time, for sure.

I will say that the kitchen guy was busting his ass, and I appreciated his efforts. He was the only one in the back, occasionally serving food as well. And then the Tour de Beers rolled in--20-30 cyclists on a daytime pub crawl. (Somehow, 2 more bartenders magically appeared then. Really wish they had appeared earlier.)

Final thought: If I end up at Naked City again, I will probably try something else. And try one of their million beers.


Great
Three Girls Bakery - Pike Place Market (Current Favorite)
Giant sandwich, warm and consistent. [It's been awhile since I've had one, but in my mind, it's the best one.]

Good
Naked City (5/9/09)
Tasty, but nothing outstanding. Could've been an off day because it was so busy, but I was hoping for something special. Craig's Reuben $9.50

Elysian Brewing Company - Tangletown
There's a caramelized sweetness that I couldn't identify after one bite. I need to try my own. $10 (12/08)

Update (4/17/09): I'm downgrading the Elysian Reuben from great to good. I had it on a Friday night, and it just wasn't the same. I couldn't taste the intriguing sweetness I remembered, and the corned beef was full of indigestible bits of fat. Considering I love the fatty bits, that says a lot.

The Pike Pub and Brewery (1/31/09)
Soggy bottom bread (hee hee), nothing special but still delicious. Wish I had fries or a salad instead of a half plate of chips. $10 for the smaller Son of Reuben

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Finished (Bad Idea Part 4)

I feel dirty for finishing that book in less than a day. Probably less than 7 hours. And unfortunately--or more like as expected--once the action stopped and things were concluding, reading became tedious again. At least she was acting more like a teenager, although she still used cardinal directions to describe where kids sat during lunch. (The south side of the table? Really? The far side wasn't enough? I hate her.)

I once met a guy who hated the Harry Potter series because Rowling had a bad habit of using the pattern, "...Harry said heroically" "Dumbledore said [adverbly]", along with a few other Totally Offensive grammar patterns. But the Harry Potter series seemed much more natural compared to the book I just finished. And I hear it just gets worse. Great.

While the experience wasn't unbearable, I'm no convert. I'll probably end up reading them all, because they're like candy, even though I know what goes down in the next three books and my writing will probably suffer because of it.

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Page 416 (Bad Idea Part 3)

I hate this book. It's too easy to read, making it difficult to put down. It's addictive, sure, but any suspenseful book is. I need to get out of the house.

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Page 196 (Bad Idea Part 2)

It irks me that I've only been reading for 3 hours, and I'm on page 196. If I'm reading that fast, it must be enjoyable, right? No. It's double-spaced with wide margins. I resent this.

At least there are fewer painful descriptions now. I wanted to punch something every time Meyer used a clunky phrase--west-facing bedrooms and permeable clothing. Bleh. It almost feels like she wrote all the "fun" high school stuff first and then her editor insisted on more descriptions and back story.

The "Do I dazzle you?" "Frequently." exchange made me laugh. I wonder how the people who genuinely like this book reacted when they read it. I believe I'll have to watch the movie drunk.

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Bad Idea.

I am trying to read Twilight, just to see what the hype is all about.

Unfortunately, I just finished reading Couch a few hours ago, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Switching to Twilight is jarring. Like eating strawberries and whipped cream and then trying to eat a tub of frosting.

Oh, and on page 7, page fricking 7, there is a perfect brown fingerprint. Flipping through the book, there's at least one more. There is no goddamn way some moronic gothlette left a bloody fingerprint in a fluffy vampire book, yet I'm still suspicious. Gross gross gross. Did I just scratch my eye after touching the grubby vampire book? Gah.

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My fingers are smart.

Awhile back, I saw this tiny plate with the Space Needle on it, and really wanted it. But for $24+$10 shipping, it was just too much for a tiny plate. It was late 2007, so I was already up here, but Seattle was still extremely new and exciting. I was pretty bummed, but eventually I got over it.

On Tuesday, after one last lunch at a Mexican restaurant (it was Cinco de Mayo, totally unintentional), Kr and I stopped at the Goodwill to drop off one last box from her office. And wouldn't you know, as I was blindly reaching for plates on a shelf above eye level (a shelf you could've seen, no problem), I pulled a Space Needle plate with a 99¢ price tag. Sure, I felt a little bit smug that I picked up such a bargain (although it's a little chipped), but mostly I was delighted that I got something I really wanted. Yay!

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My heart just went a little melty.

Aww, you guys--I did front desk for interviews this year, and one of the interviewees tracked me down on Facebook and told me they got in. Not creepy at all. Just heart-melty. Aww.

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